oh! good.

i forgot about the library.

i thought about it, but i forgot about it just as quick.

yesterday, i remembered.

i was having an overly sick day, but the couch got hard after about an hour and megavideo timed me out so i couldn't finish the episode of project runway that i was watching and the temperature sheepishly peeked its sorry head just above freezing {it's not supposed to last long, but it's here and that's enough} and i thought, "it's nice outside; i should go visit my friend at the flower shop."

because, in case you didn't know, my friend works at a flower shop. 

in case you didn't know that.

i made it a quarter of the way to the flower shop when i discovered a thing: i wasn't probably going to make it. 

so i thought, "i can't just give up, but maybe i'll go visit my friend at the paper shop instead."

because, in case you didn't know, there is a lovely lady who works at the paper shop and she always remembers who i am and acts like she's happier to see me than anybody else. even though i know she's probably just like that to everyone all the time. 

i still feel special.

i made it almost half of the way from where i was to where the paper shop was, which from my house is about half of the way to the flower shop, when i found something out: i wasn't probably going to make it. 

so i thought, "maybe i'll just go home."

but then i looked up and saw the library.

so i thought, "oh! good."

the library is magic, in the loosest sense of the word, because you can go inside for free and then you can have anything you find there for free. 

{but not the computers, you can't have those, though.}

i always sit on the floor in front of the cds and feel like a crazy person.

i feel like i need to take the whole cabinet home with me. 

i sit on my gloves and lean against my backpack like it's a turtle shell, and i flip through the cases and i grin like a fantastic idiot. 

i can pick a cd based on cover art, based on a feeling or a foggy memory of someone saying it was a good one, based on one song i heard once at a friend's house or at a show. 

you just can't do that when money's involved.

but the point is not that.

the point is that i found a completely fantastic mittenfull of stuff--some cds i hadn't heard in years, some i'd been contemplating buying, some i'd never heard before. 

and i left with all my money. 

all of it. 

not one cent less.

i quickly made the trek home, deciding which cd i would listen to first and taking pictures with my cell phone while pretending to talk on it {because there was a lot of traffic and i didn't want anyone to think i was taking pictures of them}.

it was a neon day.

so far, i've listened to keane's under the iron sea four times and wintersleep's welcome to the night sky twice.

have you been to the library lately?

PS: if you could go HERE and click the vote for this idea button, i'd just think you were the best person on the internet. 

on my way back home

okay, i think i'm back.

am i back? 

is this thing on? 

check, check. hello?

it's been a movie week. 

on my way back home on sunday, the song by that name came on and i felt like credits were rolling and the movie was over and everything that had happened over the course of the last few days hadn't really happened in real life.



it was the same feeling as i had after watching that foreign film at the library last year: though i didn't really understand everything that had gone on, it was beautiful and heartbreaking and real but in a somewhere else sort of way.

but then i parked in my driveway and turned the car off and the movie was still playing, even after the credits stopped rolling. 

and i guess that those weren't the credits, it was just another scene. 

i've always loved moments like that, where everything settles like dirt after a windstorm, even if it's not a perfect or necessarily happy ending. because you probably learned something, even if all you learned is that life is hard sometimes. 

and then you get up and keep going. 

how to get to a certain place from here

go down that street

take a left

shoulder check

{see, you almost hit that semi truck}

on, past the trees

past the starbucks

past the shopping cart

come to a complete stop

you're almost there 

now you're where i am

and we're going to have such a nice time

oh tinsel tree 2010

i recognize that the cool thing to do these days is to ride into the woods on a sleigh pulled by two horses and chop down a tall evergreen with your own bare hands, or an axe, while sipping hot chocolate, wearing a pretty party dress, and taking ridiculous amounts of professional-looking pictures on your expensive camera. i understand that the cool thing to do these days is to decorate said tree with vintagey, creative, DIY-type ornaments and garlands while listening to sufjan stevens Christmas albums and still taking ridiculous amounts of professional-looking pictures on your expensive camera. 

well, we still have our 3 dollar tinsel tree from canadian tire which looks suspiciously like a spaceship. and when it's lit up, i'm pretty sure we could pop a bag of microwave popcorn beneath it. 

forget the tanning bed; we have an ultraviolet Christmas tree. 

and i think it's nice. in an alien-esque sort of way. 

so anyways, we put that up and decorated it and drank cinnamon heart tea lattes and listened to a Christmas music mix from last year and made a nest on the floor and fell asleep beneath the radioactive glow of our little tree. 

storm-stayed in my bedroom, eating chocolate chips

hi. 

i love winter. i love it. i love love love it so much.

did you realize how easy it is to like something you hate just by deciding to? 

surprisingly.

but the point is not that.

the point is that i just remembered that last week i posted a riddle:

"my left foot is right and my right foot is not."

did you guess it yet? probably not, it's kind of a silly riddle. the answer has to do with the socks i'm wearing. 

see?

it's thursday. so my left foot is right...

anyways, i'm sorry about that, guys; i feel like most of you are groaning and saying how stupid that was.

one last thing:

for those of you who wanted to see the rest of my vacation pictures from last week, {such as you, jenglen} you can see them here. i simply don't feel like spending all night uploading. 

cheers!

one week later

honey, i'm home.


i hope you had a nice week. i did, except that i'm terribly paranoid and thought i was going to die this week at least one time per day, sometimes several. especially on friday.
i took some pictures with my trusty new disposable camera and, as per usual, my cell phone. i'm still waiting for the nice camera fairy to light on my windowsill and endow me with an xlr3000000025qpr super supreme with five different lenses and a fancy carrying bag and the skills to use it but for now, these will have to do.

a nifty van i found parked right in the exact perfect spot.

 a boat we lived on for a week.

enter sandman. 

[underneath the sand is a barclay.]

 a colossal sunset painted just for me, probably.

 miami, too cool for school.

 my family playing by the ocean.

the winner of my personal pretend graffiti awards.

 i spy with my little eye, a boat. can you see it?

 they are nice for laying in. getting out is the pits.

 my sister took this. to me, it symbolizes strength. 

 my sister also took this. moving sidewalks are the most.

 i'd never seen a tightrope walker before. i almost peed my pants. 

(at first there, i accidentally typed, "i almost peed his pants." pretty impossible, as you can see how high up his pants actually are.)

i have to go get ready for church. i'll talk at you later, and maybe post more pictures, if you don't mind. haaaave a nice day, and you stay classy blogosphere.

next year maybe i will read this and laugh my head off

today i really should have stayed in bed. i try not to say that phrase too much because i don't want to be a debbie downer and i don't like whining, but today it's not so much emotional as financial.
because it just would have been cheaper to stay in bed today.

i woke up feeling sick and weepy. you know what i mean by weepy right? i don't mean emotional. i mean beyond that. like if emotional is a street lamp, weepy is like some star a billion light-years beyond it. i mean if i were to watch dumb and dumber right now, i would probably cry at the part where lloyd and harry get mad at each other. it's like that.

most people call in sick when they're sick. i only call in sick when i can't get out of bed, otherwise i wouldn't really have a job anymore. so i sit up, and if that goes ok i stand up, and if i'm still good i walk upstairs to where barclay is making brekkie [he makes me turkey bacon and eggs every single morning, i'm not even making that up] and if the food goes down ok then i'm good to go. sort of.
to make a long story a teensy bit shorter, this morning i ended up deciding to go to work.

i got in my car, backed out of the driveway, and started down the street, realizing at the moment that i started to go forward that my windshield was a bit on the foggy side. i could see out of it but felt like i should probably wipe it all off anyway. so, at the next available chunk of side-of-the-road [about a block or two later], i pulled over and got out of the vehicle.

sirens, lights, sirens, lights. i jumped out of my skin and back into my car. oh my heart.
i think that policemen should not be allowed to just sneak up behind you and just blare their sirens right in your ear. i made sure to give him a look that said 'how rude!' i made sure to point it at my steering wheel instead of him so that he wouldn't get mad at me.

but he got mad anyway. he came and yelled at me about killing people and driving dangerously and killing people and driving dangerously and paying a fine. and then he gave me a ticket. not a movie ticket, not a concert ticket, a, like, a ticket ticket. for 125 bucks, for having a foggy windshield. and i sat there and cried and cried because that's what happens when you yell at a weepy girl, these weird snort/sob/gaspy/wail things. he probably thought it was me trying to get sympathy but i didn't need his sympathy; i felt sorry for myself enough for the both of us.

at this point, please do not comment and say, "well he was right, you shouldn't have been driving with a foggy windshield."
because i know that. that's why i pulled over. it's just lame and i'm weepy and i feel like my head is falling off.
and yes, tomorrow, i'll absolutely wipe my window off before i leave.

anyway, here is a picture of a house that i took with my phone on sunday. i thought it looked nice in person, and i think it sort of looks nice in picture too.

the weekend of five

this weekend reminded me a lot of being five. because because because because because...

1. barclay and i went to my parent's farm. that's where i hung out most when i was five. [because i lived there.]

2. on saturday morning before brekkie, we went outside and jumped on the trampoline and rode bikes in our pajamas. do you know how much i love being outside in pajamas?
more than you think times 12 is how much.

 3. after brekkie, we built a fort in the trees. and yes, i was still in my pajamas.

4. dad got out the gun and the boys shot pop cans off the front porch.

5. we played in the coolest tree house of all times.

6. a happy host of other reasons such as eating like i had the metabolism of a 5 year old, building puzzles and playing games on the floor of the living room, family movie night, and crokinole.

on the way home, we got stuck in 10 km/h traffic like one can only do in the prairies.

all in all, i give thanksgiving weekend 2010 a massive thumbs up, or one pickle.

how was yours?  [i realize you're not all canadian. so you'll have to wait a while to answer this question i guess.]