Friday, October 1, 2010

welcome to the twilight zone...

There is a fifth dimension, beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination, a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas; you've just crossed over into the Twilight Zone... [-rod serling]

it was saturday, september 25. almost a week ago now. the streets were packed, the skies were only slightly cloudy, and they were lost.
being lost is a fine thing, when you don't really have anywhere in particular you're going to in the first place, and this was the case for the young couple on this day. it is arguable then that in this instance they were not technically "lost", just aimless, but in either case they absolutely did not know where they were.
they'd arrived in the city just then, and were looking for something to do. it didn't need to be something extraordinary, just needed to be something to pass the time together. they'd come here for no other reason.

somebody's car alarm was going off, a police siren sang in the background, construction workers pounded away at the cement in a closed lane. a student driver gas-braked his way through the noise. car horns blared: "YOU'RE GOING TOO SLOW" "YOU'RE GOING TOO FAST" "I'M GOING TO RUN YOU OVER" "YOU ARE TOO UGLY TO DRIVE A CAR" "GET OFF THE ROAD".
it is a wonder there are not more traffic accidents. it is a wonder, with all this going on, that there is room for anyone to actually drive.
"can't find a parking spot..." he mumbled as he inched through the city with the mass of cars. she was draped over her seat, searching in the back for a sweater. it was an easier thing to find than a parking spot.
a sign: PARKING GARAGE. an arrow. good.
he pulled up to the doors, pushed the button on the parking machine. the bar lifted, the door opened, "please take your ticket."
he did. it had the parking rates and directions on the back.

it was eerie, the way that the garage door closed behind them.
when you drive into a city, you don't notice the horns, the sirens, the hum of thousands of people in a hurry. you hear it far off without really knowing that you're hearing it and it builds into a solid sound that doesn't make any noise. but as they drove into the parking garage and the door closed behind them, they heard a sound that was louder than the collective city murmur: nothing.

she was instantly uneasy. white walls, concrete everything, not a single car in sight.
"well, i guess we have our pick of parking spots."
they parked, got out of their car. he took her hand and they followed the exit signs across and down and out a door, back onto the busy street.
they'd been walking for some time, ducking into thrift shops and music stores here and there, stopping once for a cup of coffee too. there were no familiar faces, and they loved the anonymity that came with a strange place.
the time flew by and his feet got tired and she felt hungry and they'd seen all the shops and walked down all the streets, seen at least five different wedding parties take jumping pictures in front of a street light. it was time to find their car again.
they walked down that street--king's street, he thought it had been. they found the sign, the doors with the bars. there was the exit door they'd come out of. there was nothing--no handle, knob, no crash bar. just a lock. a locked lock. a very unhelpful, irritating, locked lock. they looked up. the building looked old. run down.
there was no way in.
he pulled the parking ticket stub from his pocket, to see if there were directions on it.

it was blank.

they looked up, and the building was gone. and so were they. and so was the world.
aliens, i think.

no, not really. barclay had just misplaced the actual ticket stub. we found it a few seconds later, and it had directions to a different entrance down the street. nevertheless, i hummed the twilight zone theme song for the rest of the day.


amylou said...

haha! You had me wondering for a moment. A good light ending to an incredibly eerie story!

Amyschmamey said...

STORY TIME! and it was AWESOME! :) Glad the ticket stub was found.

Jen Glen said...

I want a horn that says all that!

Hannah-Leanne said...

And this, my dear, is why.
Shall I start with this one then?
Just kidding.

Paige Baker said...


Chess said...

I actually got creeped out for a second. Heh!

Nell said...

Genius. Pure genius xx

deb adams said...

good story...
what city were you guys in??

Carrie Lynn said...

My husband Loooves the twilight zone. And I love this blog post.

That is why I gave you a blog award :)

Ashlee said...

I'm glad you found my blog, because now I found your blog, which is lovely and all sorts of entertaining. You might be my new favorite storyteller.

Holly Knitlightly said...


an9e1a said...

I was on the edge of my seat. :D

So... Books you've got coming out so far:

1. Joy Zits
2. Psychisiousosity
3. You're Too Ugly To Drive A Car


No, you do not want to know how long it took me to find that word.

suzy said...

aw thanks guys! :) i like me a good overreaction every now and again.
hannah: ha. ha. shhh... :)
deb: winnipeg! woo hoo. we went there for the weekend to explore it. twas nice.
angela: you are hilarious.