where the wild thing isn't

i went to see that movie the other night. the one called "where the wild things are." i loved it a lot. but the whole movie, i just couldn't believe how much the main character reminded me of kaiden. he's a little brat. the kind that, in his little child-sized fits of rage, makes enormous messes and breaks things on purpose and yells at his mom and bites her, and has her so flustered that she screams at him, doesn't know what to do with him, doesn't know why he is the way he is or does the stuff he does.

but he is a cute little rotter. his heart is big and it's in the right place. and really, he doesn't know either why he is the way he is or does the stuff he does. he's just a kid who's been through a lot and misses his dad and really he's more sad than angry, more looking for love than a reaction.

i know, it's unclear whether i'm talking about the kid in the movie or kaiden. that's because i'm talking about both of them at the same time.

anyways. the point is not that.

the point is, that movie made me miss my little guy. i'd been having a hard time deciding what i want for Christmas this year. last night, i decided that i want something i can't have: for Christmas, i would like nothing more than to go sledding with kaiden again.

i'm sure he would be a lot harder to pull up the hill now, but i'd do it. i'd do it a hundred times, because he always had more energy than anyone else i know.

and then we'd head back to the house and have hot chocolate and he would just skim the marshmallows off the top and gobble them up and ask for more of those and not even touch the drink part of the drink because it's too hot, and then too cold [but he'd still want one because hot chocolate after playing in the snow is the right thing to do]. then grampa would build a fire and we'd just hang out and eat popcorn. and he'd curl up in my lap and talk about gunks and other aminals he found in the trees this week. in that fort of his that is still there behind cookie and grampa's house to this day and probably always will be because he was a good fort builder. his forts were built to last.

anyways.

miss ya buddy.