Wednesday, May 13, 2009


i'm being backwards-stalked. like, stalked in such a way that whoever is stalking me is making me feel like i'm the one doing the stalking. [this happens to me all the time.]
like once, when i lived in swift current, i saw this dude in that pita place on that service road. he saw me. we were both standing in line. i got my pita, and headed for my car. as i was backing up to pull out of the parking lot, i noticed him walking towards my car. strange, i thought. he's coming to talk to me? but no, he couldn't be. i continued to back up. he walked faster. he was indeed coming towards me. i started to pull away, he started to run. he caught up with me and started pounding on my window. flustered, i sat there and stared at him through the window. was he going to mug me? i could drive away. but i was curious. i cracked the window down a bit.
he shouted, "THERE'S A PITA ON YOUR CAR!"
cuz i'm stupid and i left my pita on the roof of my car and started to drive away.
that's not the backwards-stalking part.
the backwards-stalking part was where i began to see him everywhere. i went to a concert and he was sitting behind me. i went to another concert and he was the lead singer of the opening band. he was at the mall, in church, at the park, at the show; he usually got wherever i saw him before i did, so i felt very guilty of stalkery, but was actually quite innocent. by the end of my time in swift current, i knew exactly who he was and where he was from and who his sister was, and other random trivia regarding him, but had never officially met him. i was a dirty rotten stalker. but not on purpose, though. the last time i saw him, i was at a friend of a friend's house for the first time, and he came out of the bathroom, in a towel. he saw me and we had a brief awkward moment of recognition. he said "you" and i said "yeah" and he looked longingly at the door he'd come out of, wishing he hadn't come of out it and probably wondering what the stalker girl was doing in his living room and why his friend had invited her there. i'm sure everyone else in the room was curious, but when they asked if we knew each other, it was like, "yeah" "no" "well no" well he rescued my pita" "well yeah". and then he was gone. then he quit backwards-stalking me. or i just moved out of swift current.
right now, i'm being backwards-stalked by a tan SUV with a bumper sticker that says, "you belong outside" and a white car with a nikita sticker on the back window and a girl with bleached-blonde hair in the driver's seat. everywhere i go, for the past 8 months or so, i get stuck in traffic behind one of these two vehicles. somehow, they always know where i'm going, and go there right before me.
coincidence? yes, probably.
or else i'm being backwards-stalked.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...'s a good thing you have a big strong man to protect you from the backwards stalkers (especially the bleach blonde...they're always the scariest)!
ps. I was thinking about you the other day when I was riding the bus listening to Mother Mother on my ipod. I was probably smiling like an idiot the whole ride home but oh well :)